


Fix Me With Your Crushing Hugs

by Spoon_Killer97



Series: We Are Alike... [1]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types
Genre: A little, Alec just needs his boyfriend, Depression, Fluff, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Protective Magnus Bane, The truth is Alec just woke up having a bad day, Warning: Mentions of suicide attempt, sorry for this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-31
Updated: 2017-08-31
Packaged: 2018-12-22 00:00:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,774
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11955474
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spoon_Killer97/pseuds/Spoon_Killer97
Summary: Alec woke up felling terrible, so at the end of the day he calls Magnus for support. The warlock is more that willing to comfort him.





	Fix Me With Your Crushing Hugs

**Author's Note:**

> The truth, guys, is that I woke up feeling like shit yesterday. I felt disappointed with myself and incredibly stressed out and I didn't understand why. I had a test which I think went good and I have another one today, so I really don't get it.
> 
> But the point is, I thought the whole day how good would it feel if I just had a boyfriend who cuddle me until I felt better. My family is not like that and my parents actually don't understand how I wake up like that, so they're not an option. So, since I'm a lonely potato I decided to pour myself into Alec and have Magnus comforting him.
> 
> I wasn't as bad as Alec is, I cried for a couple of minutes but then I felt better, specially after seeing my friends, but you get it. I don't know if you're even going to like this, I just needed out of my system and that's all. Enjoy, I guess.
> 
> WARNING: MENTIONS OF SUICIDE ATTEMPT. Please stay safe, I know what's like to be on the "ledge of the balcony"; talk to someone, please.

Magnus was making some potions for a client when his phone rang. He smiled when he saw the ID before answering the phone.

“Alexander, what a pleasant call,” he said. But Magnus immediately frowned when he heard a sniffling sound.

“Hey, Magnus,” his Shadowhunter answered in a broken voice.

“Darling, are you okay? Why are you crying?” Magnus’ concerned voice made Alec flinch a little specially because the warlock noticed he was crying.

“I’m- I just… It’s nothing, really,” he answered before another sniffle. “You must be busy I shouldn’t have called.”

“Alexander,” Magnus called firmly but with concern to stop his lover from hanging up. “I’m not busy, you can talk to me, love. Please.”

“It’s- It’s stupid, Magnus. Really, I’ll call you tomorrow.”

“Alec, please,” Magnus said with desperation. “Talk to me. I won’t be able to sleep or think knowing that there’s something wrong. For me it’s not stupid, I care about you, don’t do this to me.”

Magnus couldn’t see it but Alec felt how his eyes filled again and more tears came down. He sighed in an attempt to find a better voice and continue.

“I just- I just needed to hear you voice,” the Nephilim finally answered in a broken voice, after a sniffle. “You told me on Max’s party to tell you if things ever got that bad and—“

Magnus couldn’t helped but inhaled air sharply and loudly. His body froze and he felt his stomach flipping in pure primal fear. The image of Alec standing on the ledge of his balcony came alarmingly clear to his mind. The felt an urge to locate Alec and held him. This conversation wasn’t working over the phone.

“It’s not!” Alec immediately clarified, realizing how that sounded and hearing Magnus’ reaction. “It’s not _that_ bad! I- I love my life, Magnus. I’m not going to do anything stupid.”

Despite the tears, that sounded firmer and Magnus felt a little calmer at the statement but he was still worried.

“What I meant,” Alec continued. “Is that, since you told me to talk to you when things got that bad I just- I asume that it applied for when things weren’t terrible but still a little bad.”

“Of course, Alexander,” Magnus answered right away, still with a desperate tone. “You can talk to me about anything, what happened, darling?”

“I- I don’t know,” the Hunter answered honestly. “I woke up like this and during the day it’s been getting worse and… It doesn’t make sense. I told you it was stupid.”

“It’s not, sweetheart,” Magnus said as his voice softened. “Where are you right now?”

“In my room, at the Institute,” Alec answered with another sniffle. Magnus felt and unsettling pang in his heart.

“Alone?” he asked carefully. Alec sobbed again softly.

“Yes. Don’t worry like that,” he told Magnus without a trace of heat. He knew exactly what the warlock was thinking. “I told you, I’m not going to do anything stupid.”

“I’m sorry,” Magnus said sincerely ashamed. “You just worried me a lot, love.”

“I get it, sorry for saying it like that.”

“Well, do you wanna come over here, darling?” Magnus offered praying that Alec would say yes. “We don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to, but I can cuddle you or anything that can make you feel better.”

“I already feel better,” Alec answered with a soft smile that Magnus could hear, despite the crying. “But I do want to go there.”

“Good,” the warlock said after a sigh of relief. “I’ll create a portal in your room.”

“Okay,” Alec answered softly.

“I’ll hang up know since you know reception is not good for portals. See you in a minute, darling.” With that, he reluctantly hung up and hurried to open the portal.

Magnus snapped his fingers and cleaned the living room from his previous work as his Hunter stepped through the portal. He was wearing sweatpants but with his combat boots and leather jacked. His hair looked more messed than usual and his eyes were puffy and red with some tears still running down.

Magnus closed the distance between them in fast steps and pulled Alec into a crushing hug as the portal closed. Alec hugged him back just as eager.

“It’s fine,” Magnus soothed. “Everything is going to be fine, sweetie.”

They hugged for some moments until Alec stopped crying and pulled away. They went to sit on the sofa and Magnus moved to the kitchen to make some tea for the both of them.

When he got back, Alec was fidgeting with his hands and the bruises of his knuckles. Magnus handed him the tea and he smiled thankfully before sipping it a little.

“So,” Magnus broke the silence, taking one of Alec’s hands and softly using his magic to heal it. The Hunter let him, showing Magnus that he was okay with taking the physical pain away. _Thankfully_. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Alec nodded softly looking at Magnus like a kicked puppy. He looked completely vulnerable and all the warlock wanted to do was wrap his arms around him and protect him from the wrongs in the world.

“I just woke up early today and I wasn’t feeling okay,” Alec explained. “I felt more tired that usual and then I felt angry. When I saw Izzy in the kitchen I felt annoyed with her, but the truth was that I was feeling incredibly sad and I didn’t wanted her to notice.”

Alec pause and sipped his tea again before leaving the cup on the coffee table and moving closer to Magnus, who took his other hand and started healing it too.

“I went through the day, we went out on missions and I did my job but it didn’t got better. My head keep running and I felt an overwhelming amount of stress and I don’t even know why.” Alec’s voice sounded more frustrated but also defeated.

“I stated having bad thoughts about myself, and I know I’m past that but I started wondering if I’m a good Shadowhunter or if I’m a disappointment to my parents, I- I saw Jace and Clary and couldn’t help to think how good they looked with each other and I wondered—“ Alec stopped as the tears came again.

Magnus wrapped his arms and hugged him again. He was glad Alec was conscious that he was indeed having bad thoughts about himself and that they were not true.

“Shhh,” the warlock soothed caressing his messy hair. “What did you wonder, darling?”

Alec pulled away slightly calming down again but not looking at Magnus.

“I wondered if maybe you needed of preferred a person that made you look as good as them, not someone so- so plain… Like me.”

Magnus felt his heart clenched. No, anything but Alexander doubting himself with Magnus. He placed a hand on the Nephilim’s cheek making him look up.

“Alexander, there is no one, and hear me out, no one in this universe as perfect as you are for me,” he said with fierce eyes. “We look perfect together, we look powerful and if you don’t believe me, ask around. I love you, I’m deeply, dangerously in love with you and I wouldn’t want anyone else.”

Alec sobbed a little but then nodded. He was already feeling better. Magnus felt his heart calming again by seeing how Alec was slowly feeling better.

“Thank you, I love you too,” he said. “The point is, that later in the day I thought that maybe a training session would make me feel better, but it didn’t. You see that I exceeded myself and even forgot about the _iratze_ rune and then, at night, I thought that maybe talking to you would do the trick.”

“And did it?” Magnus asked softly as he caressed his boyfriend’s cheek and hand.

“Yes, I’m feeling a thousand times better. I don’t understand why I felt that way though,” he said with a frown at the end.

“It happens sometimes, darling,” Magnus told him. “We just wake up feeling like that and there’s not much we can do. But the point alway is in talking things out, I’m here for you, no matter what. I’m not your boyfriend for only your good days, I’m your full time boyfriend and I’m for anything you need.”

It was Alec the one who hugged Magnus this time. The warlock drew soothing patterns on his back as he kissed his hair softly. Alec had seen him at his worse, he’d known his most painful memories and he was still by his side. Magnus was more that willing to do the same with Alec at anytime.

“Can we go to bed now?” Alec asked, still hugging him. “I just want to cuddle with you until I fall asleep and feel better… If- If that’s okay, I mean—“

“I wouldn’t have it any other way, my love,” Magnus said pulling away and giving him a soft peck on the cheek.

They went to the warlock’s room and got ready for bed. Magnus pulled the covers and lied down first. Alec lied down next, cuddling on Magnus’ body. He rested his face on the warlock chest and draped an arm over his torso.

Magnus hugged Alec with both arms, caressing his hair and arm softly.

“I love you,” Alec whispered after some moments. “Thank you for being so good to me and accepting me and helping me so much. I never felt like this with anyone and I know that I will never feel like this with anyone else.”

“How can you be so sure?” Magnus asked softy too.

“Because you are the first person with whom I haven’t felt ashamed of who I am. Who made me feel loved and wanted and worth.” Magnus’ heart started beating like wild at his lover’s words. “And because before I loved you, I never liked anyone as much as I liked you.”

Magnus swallowed the pleasant lump that formed in his throat.

“You’ve done the same for me, Alexander,” he said in a strained voice. “You’ve seen me at my worse and you haven’t run away. You still look at me with the same awe of that very first day, even though you know the not-so-good angles of myself. I love you too… I love you like I’ve never loved anyone before."

Alec smiled at the words as his heart did a pleasant flip. He kissed Magnus’ chest feeling completely recovered.

“Good night, Magnus,” he whispered softly.

“Good night, my darling,” Magnus whispered back with a smile and a final kiss to his head.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so sorry, I know it's not even good, I just felt like writing it. Sorry about the long note too, I needed to explain myself.


End file.
